


Trading Terms

by mandykaysfic



Category: Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: Drabble, Drabble Sequence, F/M, Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-01
Updated: 2014-03-01
Packaged: 2018-01-14 03:45:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 588
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1251562
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mandykaysfic/pseuds/mandykaysfic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Captain Janeway has to rethink her ideas on how to get Voyager home in 5 drabbles.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Trading Terms

**Trading Terms**  
PG-13  
Janeway

 

Summary: Weapons turned out not to be the most valuable commodity in the Delta Quadrant.

 

Kathryn Janeway stared at the list of names. It was now very short. She'd expected to fight to prevent Federation technology from falling into the wrong hands in the Delta Quadrant. She'd rehearsed a list of reasons why they could not, would not provide weapons to those with whom they sought to trade. Nobody had anticipated this.

She checked the terms acceptable to the Cha'artica. Male. That was a relief. She'd run out of females over a month ago. But facts were facts. Voyager simply didn't have enough virgins on board to participate in ritual trade agreements for seventy years.

END

 

**Preparing to Trade**  
PG-13  
Senior staff

Summary: Even Janeway has to compromise sometimes.

 

“I could surgically restore hymens. On volunteers,” added the EMH hastily.

“Who would be prepared to volunteer for that?” wondered Chakotay.

“Who's to say their females even have hymens? Can't we request their medical records? If they're not expecting to see blood, then someone can fake being one,” suggested Tom.

“Women are ususally pretty good at faking things,” put in Harry. He flushed and stammered, “I mean, men can fake things too. It's not as if we can tell physically whether men are virgins.” 

Janeway sighed. “Very well. Starfleet principles be damned. We'll just have to fake our way home.”

END

 

**A Superior Trade**  
PG-13  
Senior staff

Summary: When only the best will do.

 

“No virgins required this time,” reported Neelix

“Good. What do they want?” asked Janeway

“The second most common request.”

“Public exhibition of mating rituals?” guessed Chakotay.

“I'll do it,” said Tom before Janeway could say anything. “B'Elanna?” They'd done it before to get dilithium.

Neelix shook his head. “Females are strictly sequestered. They desire a performance lasting one hour, culminating in the spilling of sacred seed. It's a male fertility rite.”

“Harry? You up for it?” Tom sniggered.

“No. It must be Commander Chakotay and...” 

Tom looked up hopefully

“Tuvok. Sorry, Tom. Only offerings from the most superior are acceptable.”

END

 

**Emergency Trading**  
PG-13  
Senior staff

Summary: Janeway has a new idea for Voyager's participation in trading.

 

Janeway surveyed her senior staff. This time the locals required a symbolic sacrifice, involving stone alters, restraints, and the spilling of a small amount of blood. Just a simple cut, she was assured. They didn't even want to keep a sample of the blood for their own purposes.

Harry crossed his arms over his chest; his scars still throbbed.

Tuvok refused on the grounds of a previously unmentioned obscure religious law.

Tom and Chakotay glared at one another, but neither spoke up.

“Wait! Congratulations, Doctor. As you can't be injured, with some new programming, you're now the Emergency Trading Hologram.” 

END

 

**Ideas for Better Trading**  
Mature  
Lower decks crew

 

Summary: Some of the crew believe Janeway doesn't best use the resources she has.

 

“It's not fair.”

“I know. Dalby's a sadist to the core.”

“Yeah, although Suder's the best at blood play.”

“But Ayala... Did you see Henley's wings when he finished the latest piercing? And Gerron's ridges?”

“Uh huh. And really, the Delaneys are a class act on their own.”

“Not to mention Chell and Golwat.” 

“Janeway's wasting opportunities here, keeping all the trading deals for the senior staff. Do you ever read the mission reports? They're so boring. Virtually all vanilla. We could've been home by now if some of the rest of us had been able to demonstrate our talents.”

END


End file.
